{"id":7558,"date":"2026-01-12T12:34:41","date_gmt":"2026-01-12T12:34:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/freshstoryes.lol\/?p=7558"},"modified":"2026-01-12T12:34:41","modified_gmt":"2026-01-12T12:34:41","slug":"nikki-glaser-takes-swings-at-cbs-and-leo-goes-gentle-on-julia-in-golden-globes-monologue","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/freshstoryes.lol\/?p=7558","title":{"rendered":"Nikki Glaser takes swings at CBS and Leo, goes gentle on Julia in Golden Globes monologue"},"content":{"rendered":"
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This image released by CBS Broadcasting shows host Nikki Glaser during the 83rd Golden Globes on Sunday, Jan. 11, 2026, at the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, Calif. (Kevork Djansezian\/CBS Broadcasting via AP)<\/div>\n

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LOS ANGELES (AP) \u2014\u00a0Nikki Glaser<\/a>\u00a0went hard then eased up in her monologue to open Sunday’s\u00a0Golden Globes<\/a>.<\/p>\n

In her earliest jokes she suggested stars in the room might be in the Epstein Files and took a shot at CBS, the network airing the show.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere are so many A-listers, and by A-listers, I do mean people who are on a list that has been heavily redacted,” she said. \u201cAnd the Golden Globe for best editing goes to the Justice Department<\/p>\n

She segued into mocking the recent woes at\u00a0CBS News<\/a>\u00a0and its killing of a critical \u201c60 Minutes\u201d story about the Trump Administration sending immigrants to a prison in El Salvador.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe award for most editing goes to CBS News,\u201d she said. \u201cYes, CBS News: America\u2019s newest place to see BS news.\u201d<\/p>\n

She didn’t bring up\u00a0Venezuela<\/a>, a subject she told The Associated Press this week she was considering mentioning, but worried it would already be old news in the chaotic moment. And there was no mention of ICE.<\/p>\n

Glaser also told the AP she was struggling to find a joke about\u00a0Julia Roberts<\/a>, saying she was so beloved and respected that nothing Glaser tried with her comedy club test audiences was landinShe found a way to come at it sideways.<\/p>\n

\u201cJust like the podcasters nominated tonight, I should not be allowed to be this close to Julia Roberts,\u201d she said, and got the big laugh she was looking for.<\/p>\n

It was Glaser’s second time hosting the show. She was quickly rehired after getting strong reviews in her first outing last year. She was hired the first time after the ruthless roast she gave the attendees of the\u00a0Netflix<\/a> roast of Tom Brady. She’s been kinder on the Globes, but her jokes still had some bite.<\/p>\n

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She made the obligatory joke about Leonardo DiCaprio<\/a>\u00a0dating young women.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cYou\u2019ve worked with every great director. You\u2019ve won three Golden Globes and an Oscar,\u201d she said. \u201cAnd the most impressive thing is that you were able to accomplish all of that before your girlfriend turned 30.\u201d<\/p>\n

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She then went meta and apologized for being so obvious.<\/p>\n

\u201cLeo, I\u2019m sorry I made that joke, it\u2019s cheap. You know what, I tried not to, but like, we don\u2019t know anything else about you, man. Like, there\u2019s nothing else, like open up!\u201d she said, getting a bigger laugh than she did for the first joke, especially from DiCaprio himself.<\/p>\n

She focused on the lean frame of\u00a0Timoth\u00e9e Chalamet<\/a>\u00a0in her inevitable joke about the nominee \u2014 and later winner \u2014 for \u201cMarty Supreme,” calling him \u201cthe first actor in history to have to put on muscle for a movie about ping pong. This is true. He gained over 60 ounces.\u201d<\/p>\n

During the show, she stood in the audience and gave a presentation on the ballroom\u2019s layout.<\/p>\n

\u201cTo my right are the tables for \u2018Hamnet,\u2019 \u2018All Her Fault\u2019 and \u2018Bugonia,’\u201d she said, \u201can area we\u2019re calling \u2018traumatized woman alley.\u2019 We\u2019ll never find out where \u2018traumatized men alley\u2019 is because they\u2019re not allowed to tell us.\u201d<\/p>\n

Like last year when she merged \u201cWicked\u201d and \u201cConclave\u201d into the aborted gag song \u201cPopeular,\u201d she started at one point to sing a deliberately hacky song.<\/p>\n

This time she pretended to accidentally say \u201cK-Pong Demon Hunters\u201d before shedding her dress to show athletic wear underneath, grabbing a ping pong paddle-shaped microphone and merging \u201cMarty Supreme\u201d with \u201cKPop Demon Hunters\u201d to the tune of the latter\u2019s best original song winner \u201cGolden.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMarty\u201d co-star Fran Drescher soon stepped out to cut Glaser off, saying in her famous nasal rasp, \u201cYou have to stop singing, your voice is so annoying.\u201d<\/p>\n

But Glaser was also on the receiving end of one joke, from\u00a0Judd Apatow<\/a>, who told a story before presenting best director.<\/p>\n

\u201cNikki Glaser used to be our babysitter,\u201d he said. \u201cThat\u2019s true. She was our babysitter. And she\u2019s like, \u2018I do standup comedy.\u2019 And then I went online to watch her set and it was all about smoking reefer and having weird sex and then she stopped being our babysitter.\u201d<\/p>\n

For more coverage of the 2026 Golden Globe Awards, visit\u00a0https:\/\/apnews.com\/hub\/golden-globe-awards<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/article>\n<\/div>\n

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Nikki Glaser returns to Golden Globes with scorched-Earth monologue: \u2018Wicked: For Money,\u2019 \u2018sexy leather handbag\u2019 Sean Penn, and all her best jokes<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Nikki Glaser<\/strong>\u00a0didn’t hold back when she returned to the Beverly Hilton to host the Golden Globes for the second consecutive year.<\/p>\n

“Yes, the Golden Globes \u2014 without a doubt the most important thing that’s happening in the world right now,” the comedian said during her opening monologue. “I’m Nikki Glaser, and just like\u00a0Wicked<\/em>, I’m back for a sequel.” She later called out the big-budget sequel for being\u00a0Wicked: For Money<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Glaser also went after the Netflix-Warner Bros. merger, the justice department for editing the Epstein files, and\u00a0CBS News<\/em> being “America’s newest place to see B.S. news” \u2014 yikes!<\/p>\n

She singled out\u00a0George Clooney<\/strong>\u00a0for “playing George Clooney” in\u00a0Jay Kelly<\/em>,\u00a0Dwayne Johnson<\/strong>\u00a0and\u00a0Kevin Hart<\/strong>\u00a0being just like\u00a0Steve Martin<\/strong>\u00a0and\u00a0Martin Short<\/strong>, only “for people under 50 IQ,” and\u00a0The White Lotus<\/em>\u00a0being the “first show to feature incest” since\u00a0Property Brothers<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Glaser went after\u00a0One Battle After Another<\/em>\u00a0star\u00a0Leonardo DiCaprio<\/strong>\u00a0for dating younger women, adding that it’s a cheap joke, but that she couldn’t find anything else about him except for the fact that he told\u00a0Teen Beat Magazine<\/em>\u00a0in 1991 that he liked “pasta, pasta, and more pasta.” She then laughed that\u00a0Sean Penn<\/strong> looks just like a “sexy leather handbag.”<\/p>\n

Two of the biggest stars of the past month \u2014\u00a0Hudson Williams<\/strong>\u00a0and\u00a0Connor Storrie<\/strong>\u00a0from the gay hockey drama\u00a0Heated Rivalry<\/em>\u00a0\u2014 were seen laughing as Glaser remarked, “Stories like these don’t always get told, and I hope that the success of\u00a0Heated Rivalry<\/em>\u00a0is proof that American audiences are ready for more shows about hockey.”<\/p>\n

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